Monday, December 29, 2008



Christmas has come and gone, though it was A LOT of fun, I have to admit I am glad it has passed. It so stressful. Half the time I didn't even know if I was coming or going. My brain feels like mush.

~Stretches out legs and puts hands behind head~ I can now just relax a bit and wait patiently for New Year. Ahhhhhhhhhh.

I know I haven't been writing much lately, hopefully I will get back into soon. Things have been crazy the last few weeks, but they are starting to get back to normal. I did however take off the Christmas music and add a new playlist at the very bottom of my blog. Hope you enjoy the off the wall selections. I feeling a little ol' school when I chose a lot of the music. lol

If you read my other blog that I co-write on, you will notcie we have taken a small break with that one too. Have no fear! The writing will commense shortly.

Anyhoo.....I just wanted to let you know that I was still alive. I must go due to children waking up. I will get myself on a new writing schedule soon!

~waves goodbye~

Ta Ta

Friday, December 12, 2008

Tis the season, I guess....

Well, it is that time of year again....Christmas is sneaking up on us! I don't know about you, but I have mixed feelings about this time of year. lol Christmas and I have this love/hate relationship that has been going on for about the last five years. I try REALLY hard every year to get into the Christmas spirit, but it is hit and day I get giddy and LOVE the idea of putting up decorations, shopping for presents, listening to Christmas music while sitting by the fire with my husband, watching Christmas movies, and most of all....being with my family. BUT...on other days, (makes fart noise and give Christmas a thumbs down)...I could a give a shit and just feel depressed. :-(

Right now, I feel pretty "Christmasy" hence the new music on my blog. BTW...I provided a large list on the displayer at very bottom of my blog, please feel free to choose whatever you want to listen to. I have a varied selection. Of course some of you are probably saying "ARE YOU CRAZY!? WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU PUT X-MAS MUSIC ON YOUR BLOG?" All I can say is....I do not listen to the radio, so I haven't heard any yet. lol I actually thought about writing out Christmas cards (GASP! I never do these) and maybe going Christmas shopping this weekend....but I will probably change my mind once I do bills and look at what's left of our money. /cry Finances also seem to get me down lately. I have not bought one present yet. lol

Starting in November, money starts to get really tight around our house. It just so depressing! lol We have tried to learn form our mistakes (I SWEAR!) We save up money for this time of year, but it just never seems to work out. Something ALWAYS comes up where we have to "dip" into our saved money. First we have tag two cars, and then we have the birthdays..sigh. Tyler and Dakotah's Bday is on Nov 27th, then mine on Dec 10th, and the Kiera's on the 14th. Four Bdays in about 3 weeks time frame. That is a lot of extra spending right there. It also NEVER fails that we all get sick in November or December. We just try and do the best we can. I am sure a lot of families have the same I will not bitch on this anymore. :-)

Another thing I really hate aroud this time of year is all the fucking rules we have to follow in order to be PC for Christmas time....pfffftt. What a bunch of bullshit. That is one thing about Wal-Mart I LOVE, they will tell me Merry Christmas!....not to mention I love there prices! If you have a child in school, this whole "PC" shit gets even worse. With the "Winter Programs, Winter Party," and such. Oh yeah, and DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT HAVING A CHRISTMAS PARTY AT WORK!! WHEW! That's a fucking mess just waiting to happen! What's next? Anyway, I do not want to get on a rant instead I am going treat you to a new version of the Night Before Christmas. This is written by Larry the Cable Guy, a comedian. When I heard it, I laughed my head off, but at the same time I shook my head in sadness....'cause people....I feel he makes a strong point.

Larry The Cable Guy-
"They are now trying to politically correct up Christmas Stories so that they don't offend nobody and that everybody everywhere can enjoy them. So this is a story that was formerly known as "'Twas The Night Before Christmas....."

"Twas The Night Before a Non-Denominational Winter Holiday"

Twas the night before a non-denominational winter holiday, and all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.

The neutral gift sacks were hung by the chimney with care
In hopes that a non-specific holiday figure would be soon be there.

Children of every race, creed, and nationality,were rested all snug in their beds
While visions of sugar-free plums danced in their heads.

When out on the lawn there rose such a clatter
I got out of bed to see what was the matter....and to find out who was violating the neighborhood sound level ordinance!

But what to my wondering eyes did appear?
But an emissions-free vehicle, and 8 sized-challenged reindeer.

Holiday figure was so lively and quick
I knew in a moment it must figure.

He had a broad but normal face, and an advanced sized belly,
and he laughed, "Lady of the Evening! Lady of the Evening! Lady of the Evening!"

......"Now can you believe that? What in the world -- you can't even say "Ho! Ho! Ho!" anymore?! What kind of commie crap is this? I don't care who you are his name is Santy Clause and he cracks deer with a horsewhip, breaks into people's houses, drinks rum and eggnog, and looks like Uncle Jessie from "The Dukes of Hazard"....End of Story!"

Well, I would go on, but my kids.....
I will write more soon.
Hope you enjoyed some Christmas Cheer! (well sort of LOL)

Thursday, December 4, 2008

How Does One Get To Heaven?

Well, if you are my one of my children, Dakotah.....(the one who walked in on my husband and I getting intimate last night) You would probably say "Feet first!"

Yup, that's of my children walked in on my husband and I having sex! (hides face) Last night my son Tyler was very sick, so I had left their door open and ours so that I could hear them at all times, just in case Tyler started having a coughing fit or needed his breathing machine. So, there were no door handle shakes, creaking door hinges, or anything like that to tip my off. (not that I probably could have heard any of those things at that particular moment lol) Man, the sex was GREAT!!!...except for......There I was "getting into it," my feet in the air screaming "Oh God...I'm coming....I'm coming!" and in walks a sleepy Kotah. (I'm just glad we kept it more traditional this time ROFL!) This is the first time one of my boys came into our room when we were "doing the nasty." What the hell was he doing up?! It was 5 in the morning! This is one of these VERY few times I am glad he can not speak well. (Sooooo embarrassed!!!!)

With the Autism factor coming into play here, I am divided on whether or not to address the situation or play it off like nothing happened. He didn't cry or anything like "Daddy's hurting Mommy." He was just standing there being quiet, when I just happened to look over and see him. He just had this confused look on his face like "WTF?" My reaction was "OMG!! GET OFF ME?!" as I threw my husband off my body onto the floor. BOOM! I grabbed the sheets and wrapped them around my naked body. I jumped off the bed and went to my son...."Everything ok sweetie?"I my loving mommy voice. Dakotah's reply...."Paaaaa Teeeeee" as he sticks his thumb through his fore finger and middle finger, in a fist and shakes it back and forth. (sign language for "potty") "Sure honey." I quickly led him to the bathroom so he could go potty. He peed for soooooo long. We did our little victory dance and hand washing....I checked to make sure his diaper was still dry, and then I laid him back down in his bed. I can still picture my husbands face when I paniced, yelled at him, and threw him. LOL His eyes were huge and he let out a little yelp as he was tossed. LOL SIGH......Needless to say...the "mood" was gone by the time I went back to bed.

On the other hand, Dakotah was SO proud of himself, and of course I was BEAMING with pride for him as well!! Potty training has been HELL for us. We have been trying this "potty training" shit for about two years, off and on. They just have a really hard time understanding it. When teaching a Autistic child to use the restroom, soooooo many factors come into play....including visual toilet (Try teaching two of them at the same time!!) I am ecstatic that he is finally getting the hang of is unfortunate that he interrupted "Mommy's Happy Time." But is a small price to pay, right?

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

I'm just trying to help....

Women...Have you had your boyfriend, lover, fiance, or husband have troubles understanding what constitutes as a "good" gift for holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, etc? Or Men...have you ever had trouble figuring out what that "perfect" gift might be? Most of us can probably relate to this situation. I am here to help....and maybe get a chuckle out of you. It just seems that for some reason, men have the hardest time picking out that perfect gift. So I took sometime and made a quick list of items that I would consider the worst gift ideas to buy.

Disclaimer: Now these are my opinions based on the numerous phone calls I get every year from my girlfriends, complaining about all the shitty presents they got. I always have to say, "What was he thinking?"

Before we get to the list: I got this through my email today and I loved it so much I wanted to share it with as many people as I could. Please take time to click on the link below:

OK here we go...

Ten Gifts You Should Never Get A Woman For A Special Occasion:

1. Any type of appliance that makes "housework easier." This is just a horrible idea! If your house is in need of new appliances, wait until after the holiday, birthday, anniversary, etc to purchase these items. (They are not gifts!) Buy the appliance together, go to the store and choose the one you both agree on.

2. I would recommend not buying clothes for her. Chance are you do not know her real size and her taste in clothes can very. No matter if you think you know her size.....if it doesn't fit her perfectly, her feelings will probably be hurt. If it is too small: She will feel that you thought she was much skinny then she really is and she will fill fat. Too big: She will feel that you see her as much larger then she really is, this will make her feel fat. So do yourself a favor and skip clothing....instead buy a $500 gift card to her favorite store and let her go on a shopping spree!

3. No shoes. Again this is a touching situation. Color, style, size, and feel all come into to play here. Most women are EXTREMELY picky about their shoes, so unless you would like one shoved up your ass because you bought a pair that would fit Bigfoot...stay away from these as well.

4. No exercise equipment or gym memberships. This just screams 'I think you are fat and need to lose some weight." Even if she SWEARS she wants a treadmill, don't fall for it. This is probably a test....if you buy it, you will fail. Instead, I suggest again, going shopping together for the item on any other regular day. Not only will you probably get something you both will enjoy, but just the fact that you went shopping with her will score you major long as you are not a dick.

If she asks why you didn't buy the treadmill for her, just reply "Oh honey, I wanted to get you something much more special. For this occasion I would rather spend my money trying pamper you instead." Then give her a certificate for a Day at the Spa. Trust me, I do not know one women that would not like to spend the entire day getting pampered. Make sure it includes a manicure, pedicure, facial, 1 hour massage, and maybe even a hair cut. (Kissing ass can only help you sweetie)

5. Cooking utensils. These lack creativity and thought, don't put yourself in that category. Also, most utensils are not very expensive, most women would like that you spend just a tad more money on them. A lot women see cooking as "just another chore," and purchasing these items as gifts would send the message that you agree she should be in the kitchen. (Even if you do believe she should be in the kitchen, it is best NOT to let her know that!!......bastard)

6. Never buy anything for her that you secretly want, like a bowling ball, power tool, stereo equipment, or shotgun. She will see right through this and probably kick your ass, OR she will be polite, say thank you in a tone that says "fuck you" and go return the item for something she would like. Either way you are an asshole and she will remember it for years to come. (Trust me on this one)

7. Perfume. Now some of you might be saying, "But she loves it when I get her perfume for her!" That is all fine and dandy. Perfume can be pretty expensive, but if it is only one of 3 items you are getting her...let's go for something a little more romantic. Also, if you do not know what perfume she wears, just forget about it buddy. Women are pretty particular about their perfume and will not settle for some cheap ass perfume that comes in a really "cool looking bottle." Women try on numerous perfumes looking for the one that smells "just right." The odds of you finding one that she absolutely adores is pretty slim.

8. Bubble Baths, Lotions, and Body washes. This is something you buy for someone you do not know really well, or nieces, sisters, mother-in-laws. This says "I had no clue what to get you and didn't make time to find out what you really wanted". Now guys, I know some of you are saying....awwww, those are okay....true, but....this is another item that shows no creativity, thought, or that you really care about what she wants. I can guarantee you that, if she ever shops at a mall, she probably has tons of this shit already. Choose something else.

9. No prepacked gift boxes, baskets, or tubs that contain cute little hot cocoa mugs, with 20 different types of hot cocoa, marshmallows,....the works! Or, any other "themed" gift package. These are items you get for a co-workers, neighbors, the mailman, or whatever. Basically, it is a cop-out from buying a REAL gift. I have to say, that personally I kinda like these gifts....but not from my husband. These gifts are ok from people who do not know me that well and would like me to know that they had me in mind while making their holiday shopping list. BUT THEY ARE NOT A GIFT THAT YOU GIVE TO THAT "SOMEONE SPECIAL" IN YOUR LIFE!

10. Gift Cards/Certificate. Ok I know this seems a little hypocritical considering the advice I gave earlier in #'s 2 and 4, but hear me out. The certificates I spoke of earlier I still feel are ok to give her. I am talking about gift cards for fast food places, Wal- Mart, the Mall, bookstores, or minutes on a cell phone/calling card. I mean come on....This is suppose to be your "someone special" not just your buddy. I would accept any/all of these from my friends, family, co workers, and anyone else who wants to give me one....except my husband. When you are in a relationship, you NEED to go that extra mile...spend the extra few dollars... or think in advance for that perfect present. Is that really too much to ask?

(PS if any of my family are reading this I would love movie passes to the Warren Theater!)

So anyway, I hope you enjoyed it! Hopefully, I have helped at least one person out there. I need to go for now to put my daughter to bed. Maybe later in the week, I will post some good gift ideas for both women and men. Until then.....

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Sleepy's Firsts....

The other day my daughter got into my bedroom and destroyed my beloved bookshelf. At least three shelves were completely bare because she had thrown them all on the floor. Sigh.... so I began putting them back in order when I came across my children's babybooks. I couldn't help myself, I open them and started to flip through the memories. My daughter's book is pretty much empty (Bad Mommy!!) but my son's books have quite a bit written in them. Of course I silently cussed at myself for not "staying on top" of the babybooks, but it became such a low priority over time.
As I thumbed through them I had to smile at the "Baby's Firsts..." section: First step, first word, first smile, first tooth, and so on. It started me thinking about MY firsts. Throughout life you come across many "Firsts." Your first kiss, first car, blah blah blah. Some are fantastic memories...others are down right horrible, but almost all leave a lasting impression in your mental Rolodex. So I thought it would fun to take a trip down memory lane and relive some of my Firsts, some are more of your traditional Firsts, others are just ones that kinda stick out in my mind. Enjoy.

To my mother: Please do not continue to read if you still think I am an Angel! You will be sorely disappointed lol Also, remember I am a grown women now, so do not try and ground me. :-) Love you!

My first:

Time I peed myself in public: This was when I was in Kindergarten. I asked the teacher if I may use the restroom and she told me "Of course, but could you deliver this note to the principle's office when you go?" I said "Sure." and I waited.....she continued to write a fucking novel while I did the pee pee dance right next to her. I had to pee SOOOOOOOOOOOOO bad! I crossed my legs and bit my lip trying to hold it in...and she continued to write. I bounced up and down grunting and put my hands over my crotch to help hold it in. FINALLY, she folded up the letter and handed it to me. I snatch the letter out of her hand and turned around to make a run for the bathroom. The moment my legs came uncrossed.........WHOOOOSH....Niagra Falls baby. I stood in shock thinking to myself...NO WAY did that just happen....then I cried.

Pet: Happened on the same day I peed my pants in front of my entire Kindergarten class. After I was sent to the nurse's office to phone someone to bring me some new clothes. My class had a raffle to raffle off all of my teachers pets she had at home. (She was moving and could not have any pets where she was moving to.) She was giving away some goldfish and a hamster. I ended up winning a goldfish. I personally think that she just felt sorry for me and pretended to pull my name, but it DID make me feel better would have made me feel a hell of a lot better if she would have given me that damned hamster though! Geez....come on lady. Anyway, I named him Twinkie.

Kiss: Well, when I was in first grade I cornered this one boy on the play ground and gave him a BIG smooch cause I though he was soooooo cute! (His name was Jared) He cried and told the teacher (which was a nun) her name was Sister Alfreda. Anyway, I got in trouble and had to write "I will not kiss boys" about 100 times. Bitch. I was just expressing myself man!

So some of you are probably saying .....ahhhhh that's not a REAL first kiss. lol Now my first kiss with a boyfriend-type was in 5th. His name was Mike; he walked me home from school (even though he lived across sweet) and I gave him a kiss. (No tongue or anything though...I mean come on I was in 5th grade! lol French kissing didn't come about until 6th grade hee hee)

Boyfriend: Again this was Mike in 5th grade. Now considering my age and everything even though I called him my boyfriend, he was more of a favored companion that was male. We hung out and stuff, but I wouldn't say it was a romantic relationship. It was just 'the thing' to call him my boyfriend. :-) I think I would consider my first real boyfriend to be in 7th grade, this was my puppy love. His name was Mike as well.

Alcoholic Beverage: Not counting the sips of beer my father, grandpa, or family members let me have just to see my reaction, was in 8th grade. A friend of mine had committed suicide and I was hanging out with some friends. They were putting together a time capsule for him and we buried it. One of the guys brought beer and I had a half of one with them....and OMG it tasted awful. I never acquired my taste for beer until college, and even then it had to be keg beer.

Smoking: This one belongs to my best friend at the time Shaye. She was 4 years older than I was and she smoked. One day I asked her if she would teach me how to inhale. She said sure. I wanted to know how it was done...not really so I could smoke, but just to know what it meant to "inhale." Sounds like a cop out but it is the truth. I was never one to fold under peer pressure, I am just one of those people that like to know and experience things for myself. I tried it and coughed so hard I threw up lol. This was also in 8th grade. I never smoked another cigarette until I was at a party later on in my high school years.

Crush: Let's hear it for the 8th grade!! Apparently many firsts happened in this time of my life. lol So this is when I had my first the can't sleep, think about him all the time, get dressed in the morning trying to impress him crush. His name was Micki and he was 5 years older than me LOL, but damn he was hot! I had a lot of older friends and they had brothers which in turn had friends....that is how I met him. I am sure he thought it was so cute to have this little 8th grader infatuated with him...probably laughed about it with his friends and stuff, because, me being me, told him how much I liked him. SIGH....I have never been shy. He was pretty nice about it. He told me that the age difference was a problem for him and stuff like that lol Well, anyway, years later I ran into him at a club. While his eyes practically bulged out of his skull at me (I blossomed nicely OH YEAH BABY), I was like OMG what did I ever see in this guy! lol He hit on me, I told him I had a fiance, more small talk and then went our separate ways. But I have to say....I thought it was great.

Job: My first job, besides babysitting, was at a laundry mat. YUCK! I forever hated doing laundry because of this experience. Thank God my husband would rather do laundry compared to other household chores. So he does most all of the laundry and I do most everything else....fair trade if you ask me.

Car: My first car was a 1977 Dodge Aspen, I had troubles docking that son of a bitch....Man it was a huge car lol. But it was MY boat and no one else' it did have a V8 engine in it. Boy that baby could move LOL. But I had to be careful...if I went too fast it started lifting off the ground. J/K It also was automatic. Yippee!! day my dad tells me that he might have found a car for me. I was SOOOO excited! He said that all we had to do was go to this guys house and if we could get it running we could just have it...... ooooooooooookkkkkkkkkkkkk. So it doesn't run? Nope. Perfect....what a POS right? lol Well, my dad is "The Man" he can fix anything, and he did,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,for $9! My car was a huge boat, that had no air conditioner and the heater stayed on continuously... even in the blistering heat of a Kansas summer. My car was the "Naked Car" in the summer time. You seriously had to wear the least amount of clothing possible if you did not want to die from heat stroke. I usually just wore my bikini. ( I am so not kidding here!) My friends thought it was awesome lol Especially the guys. The other unique thing about my car was that it had, what I called geezer lights, they were extra blinkers that were on the hood of the car facing the driver so you knew what blinker was on. (I am laughing my ass off here just thinking about them!) Anyway, it really was great first car, but then my sister killed him. She stole him one day and brought him back with the hood on fire....and the Aspen was no more.

Drove a Stick: So when I learned to drive it was in an automatic car. My friend Paul and my husband Adam always were trying to get me to learn how to drive a stick. Adam tried once and I couldn't even get it in first gear...then I quit. They were always on my ass about it. One night I went out with Paul to Tanner's, one of more favorable hang out places, to celebrate his completion of his firefighter training (I think) Anyway, he got soooooo drunk he could barely walk. It was then that we realized we had a problem. He had driven us there in his truck...which was a stick shift. He gives me a pep talk and we head out to the parking lot with the keys in my hands. Talk about nerves...I was about to drive a stick shift for the first time with a drunk as a co-pilot/teacher, and we were going to driving about 15 miles through the city of Wichita. He gave me a quick rundown on the mechanics of it and told me to "start her up!" It took me forever to get it into first gear and then we were off. Turning corners and stop lights were my worst enemy. We got stuck at one of the busiest intersections in town as I tried to get the fucking car back into first gear at a stoplight. I killed it probably 20 times. Finally I just put the metal to the floor and shoved it into gear, the car launched forward with such force I screamed. He keep trying to tell me about downshifting and helpful hints on using his clutch. Pfffttt...downshifting...please..fuck that! I took corners going about 30 miles per hour, tires squealing all the way. After a lot of screaming, yelling, laughing, and "close calls," we finally got home ok and because he was sooo drunk, he even laughed about how often I "grinded the gears."

Sex: My first sexual experience was with my husband. We were 17 years old, almost eighteen and I knew I was in love with this man. We were not married yet, but that was ok with me. It was a little scary, but overall a very enjoyable experience (and just has gotten better over the years! lol) I know a ton of people that say that their "first time" was AWFUL or a mistake. I disagree with both of those. By the time I had decided to have sex, I knew I wanted to. I loved him, I felt I was ready, and I wasn't just jumping into it. I even took precautions and got on birth control. (That was a fun conversation to have with my father lol) I had turned down MANY advances in the past by other guys. With him it just felt right.

Went To A Rock Concert: I was a late bloomer in this area. I didn't go to my first concert until I was 19. I was in college and living by myself at the time. My fiance was at BASIC training. I got a phone call from my friend Paul asking if I wanted to go to KC for a concert that night, he had an extra ticket because his brother couldn't make it. Eldorado was on the way, so he would just pick me up and go. I was at work, so I took off early and off we went. I saw No Doubt and Weezer opened for them. We had such a blast! Since then I have been to countless concerts. I love them. Working at a Music Store had it's of them was free concert tickets.

Apartment: What a shit-hole!!!! I was sooooo excited that when I chose my first apartment I do not think I was thinking clearly. The only good thing about it was that it was cheap....for obvious reasons lol. It had no dishwasher, no washer/dryer hook ups, and it was very small. It had shag carpet and fake wood panel walls. There were only three windows in the entire place. The door that went to the balcony didn't shut properly and was crooked. It left a gap about 2 inches at the bottom of the door, in the winter time we had to shove towels in there to keep the snow and cold air out. Oh yeah! Another odd thing was that their was a rule that you were not allowed to have more than three guests in your apartment. Bunch of Bullshit. We broke that rule of course. On the positive side, if I hadn't lived there I wouldn't have met one of my dear friends.

I Used a Vibrator: This was in the year 2001. My husband had been over seas for about 4 months and someone was getting REALLY horny. I mean come on....he was gone and I hung out with some really hot guys. Plus of course, I am just me...I am a bit of a horn-dog. Anyway, I was at work and complaining to my co-workers/friends about how horny I have been...after the kind offers "to help me out that situation" one of them said, "why don't you just masturbate?" Hmmmmmmmmm...I don't know about that. I felt dirty just thinking about it. That night I went home and tried to get myself in the mood. I got out the candles, incenses, favorite sheets, locked my door, (I had roommates), and put Gladiator in the DVD player. Over an hour passed and my arm was getting tired...FUCK IT. I was so disappointed, apparently I do not turn myself on or something. I felt like such a failure. Maybe I just do not have ''magic fingers.' So I go to bed unsatisfied. The next day, everyone of course asked me "How'd it go?" I was ashamed, but I admitted to them it was a total loss. I told them about it and they all just had this purma-grin on their faces. Christian told me that what I needed was a vibrator and suggested we go get one. So five of us Christian, Justin, Andy, Megan, and myself jump into the car and head to Priscilla's. After many discussions we found the perfect one for me. I went home, set up my room, music, candles, Gladiator muted on the TV, and closed my door. Whhhhrrrrrrrrr.........OMG!!!!!!! Three minutes later I was done. WHEW!!!! WOW, ...that...was....AWESOME! So B.O.B (Battery Operated Buddy) and I have had this wonderful relationship for YEARS now. (Yes I still have him) I take good care of him and he takes GREAT care of me whenever I need him.

Broken Bone: My first Broken Bone was also in 2001 when my husband was overseas. I had gotten a phone call from a friend that was in Japan and after we talked he wanted to talk to Cush (his best friend and she lived with us) but she was down at another apartment. He only called every other month or so, so I told him to wait for 2 mins while I ran down to get her. I put the phone down and ran out the door. I jumped off my porch and my foot landed funny and WHAM...face-plant right into the concrete. I heard a crack and felt my foot burn. I got up and limped down to the other apartment. Cush and I were walking back my I heard a pop and a sharp pain shoot up my leg. After that I needed help walking. Over night my foot bloomed in colors of purple, black, yellow, and blue. I went to the doctor and found that I had broken my Fifth Metatarsal in my left foot. It was a spiral fracture and would take about 2 months to heal. So I had to wear one of those BIG ugly boots and use sucked ass.

Skinny Dipping: In college one of our favorite things was to go to the lake for the weekend and drink ourselves into oblivion and just have a great time for the whole weekend. On our first HUGE party out at Winfield Lake, I was drunk and it was about midnight. I thought it was perfect for skinny dipping, so I told everyone I was going skinny dipping and everyone was welcome to come. Pretty much every stripped down right there and started running to the lake. WOOT!!! Since then it has been a tradition that at midnight we all go skinny dipping. Nowadays, though it happens less and less, for we all have families and are all grown up now lol. Even so, if I were ever at the lake at midnight without my children I would SO skinny dip, but they way I have gain weight the last couple years, I do not think it would be appropriate to call it Skinny is more like going for a Chunky Dunk!

Kids: My husband and I got married in the year 2000. We talked about trying to have kids after our third year anniversary. At the beginning of 2001, he was sent overseas. He got back at the end of November. While he was gone I decided to save some money and quit taking my birth control...I mean I didn't need it LOL I wasn't getting any. When he came back, I started on my birth control again. Then at the end of the summer of 2002 he was sent to Germany, I quit again...those SOBs cost me $45 a month. He came back in Oct of 2002 and we just used condoms until I could get to the doctor to get a PAP. I started the pills again in Dec of 2002 and it was agreed that I would continue to take the pills until the beginning of July 2003. At that time I would quit taking them and we would try for our first baby. I was scared about getting pregnant and kept telling him that maybe we should wait for our 5 year anniversary. (yup, I was a big pussy) Then shortly after getting back from my Spring Break vacation in March, I had suspicions that I might be pregnant. I called my cousin and close friend Kendra to come over and wait with me while I did the was positive. Shit! I cried.... a lot. I called my husband and told him, he was of course on cloud nine! He was soooooo excited!!!! "Well we are little bit ahead of schedule......maybe we just practiced too much for the big game huh?" HE WAS MAKING JOKES!!!! Can you believe it? I thought my life was over and he was just happy as could be and making fucking jokes! After about 16 weeks I was showing to be bigger than I should have been. After the sonogram we found out why....TWINS! My husband almost fell out of his chair when they told us. lol

Doctor -"Do you have twins in the family"


Doctor-"Well, you do now."

Adam--"Holy Sh__" loses balance. LOL

And the rest is history........................

So there it is, my least the ones I could think of right off the top of my head lol. I would love to hear about yours either in a blog or comments. LOL Hope you enjoyed a trip down my memory lane!

Monday, November 24, 2008

Tag I am It...

I've been tagged by fellow blogger Brooke! This means that I have to tell you eight random facts about myself and then tag eight other people to do the same. (hmmm what can I tell you that you do not already know?)

So, here it goes:

1. I am addicted to the massively multiplayer online role-playing game (MMORPG) World of Warcraft! WOOT! (BUT...I am not a geek...really!....OK, ok ,ok, ok....but at least I am a cute geek :-p)

2. I do not like to watch TV much. I do not have cable, only an antenna (by choice) and I get 5 channels. I do however love Supernatural, Bones, and Heroes. I own these series and I do try and catch them on television if I can. I LOVE MOVIES! lol I buy movies and watch them over and over when I want to watch something on my big screen television. I have a DVD collection that would make many rental stores jealous. (Pssstttt....aren't the guys off Supernatural just YUMMY!?)

3. When I eat I touch my tongue to my food before putting it in my mouth.

4. I can not drink any type of alcohol and eat food at the same time. If I am going to drink, I either drink before I eat or shortly after (that includes wine) I usually drink a soda or water with my meal.

5. I can not bong a beer.....but I can do a keg stand.

6. I have Acrophobia (fear of heights) and Claustrophobia (fear of small enclosed places) So flying in airplanes are torture for me.

7. I love all types of music. I listen to music daily. I listen to CDs I have burned or playlists I have made. I do not listen to the radio (I couldn't even tell you what the radio stations are around here or what they play)

8. I have a tattoo below my right hip, in my bikini area. It says Lucky You with a big smiley face.

These are the eight LUCKY people I have chosen to learn more about (we'll see if they comply lol):

Ok, so the tag rules are as follows: Each player starts with eight random fact/habits about themselves. People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules. At the end of your blog post, you need to tag eight people and list their names. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’ve been tagged and to read your blog.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Queen of The Castle...

SO....I would like to let everyone know that apparently, I have giving birth to 3 monkeys! OMG They climb on everything. It scares the shit out of me (and everyone else). I have gotten to the point where if they are not higher then four feet off the ground I do not sweat it much. They have taking so many spills and falls in the past it has really toughened them up. I still let them know that they are being naughty and whatnot, but my reactions have been reduced to a rolling of the eyes and a big sigh as I walk over to them and get them down. With the boys, they understand "No" most of the time, but they have difficulty understanding that it means they can not do it EVER, not just that one time. It is a daily fight with us. So it has been awhile since I freaked out about it. (Kudos to me!)

Well today I got scared! We talking heart racing and lump in the throat scared. Dakotah is usually my highest climber. His Hall of Fame climb was when he had gotten on the kitchen cabinets and was trying to get the shit off the top of the refrigerator. He was standing on his tip toes reaching for the Air Freshener. That one scared me, but today the Gold Medal goes to my 1 year old (almost two) daughter.

I was in the kitchen doing dishes and talking on the phone when I heard a crash coming from my bedroom. (this is where my daughter is suppose to be taking her nap) Her bed is in our room, because we feel it is much safer for her there than to share a room with her brothers. Anyway, I dry my hands off to go and check to see what the sounds was. I was guessing she got a hold of the DVDs again and was throwing them all over the place. BOY WAS I WRONG!

I opened the door to the bedroom to find the floor cluttered with all sorts of crap. Then I looked around the room a bit to see where she was. I didn't hear anything...she must be hiding I thought. Then I noticed one of the items of the floor was a framed picture.........HOLY SHIT. I knew where THAT was suppose to be. I looked and there she was standing on top of our entertainment center!! (with a huge smile on her face) KIERA! OMG What are you doing?! Was my response to her cute little smile. She immediately started jumping around and laughing as I shot forward to grab her. She was having the time of her life up there. I just knew she was going to fall.

I couldn't believe that she got all the way up there! That entertainment center is abut as tall as I am! After all the craziness, I began to pick up the mess on the floor and saw a dagger that has a stand to display it laying there. It had been up on there as decoration. OMG! I didn't even realize we still had that up there. I was thankful she didn't get hurt. So dangerous!

I changed her diaper and put her back to bed for her nap and boy was she pissed! She kept trying to climb out of her bed. We had a little argument and fianlly I think I won....she ended up falling asleep.

So now, I am going to have to go through the house and see what items are needing to be taking out of the rooms and moved. We had to do this with the boys....hence the reason we have no pictures or decoration on the walls in places where they might be able to reach them. But now I am going to have to do this with my bedroom too. Hopefully, she will easy to teach which items she can touch and which ones she can't. It will be a difficult task though because if you ask her..........she is the queen here not mommy!

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Wish me luck!!

So, I am sure everyone has heard or read other blogs concerning my love of Duck Tape. If not, here is a quick recap: I LOVE DUCK TAPE! lol Most importantly I use Duck Tape EVERYDAY. No Shit! I have my two sons to thank for that. They are two machines of destruction and a force to be reckon with! Not to mention they have a never ending supply of poop ready to go when you least expect it. SO....when you add those two together you get shredded diapers with shit all of over the place. No pun there....I mean it in the literal sense. I know, I know....let's all say it together.....Ewwwwwwwww, GROSS!!!! Well, my solution is simple, DUCK TAPE FOR THE WIN! Every night, I tape their entire diaper with tape in order to keep this situation under control.

Well, about a month ago I was inclined to tell my story. I entered the "Duck Tape Saves The Day" contest. It is a contest in which you submit your "Unique, amazing, or unusual" story on how Duck Tape saved your day. They have stopped taking entries and are now deciding on the winners. The winners will be posted on November 13th. So wish me luck! I do not know what my chances are. I scammed through some of the stories and it seems that Duck Tape diapers are not so rare lol. I thought you guys might get a kick out of reading my entry so I included it into my blog, along with a picture of what the diapers look like.

NOTE: I was only allowed to use 250 words including the title, or else this story would have been much longer lol

So without further delay, here is my story!

Drumroll please!................................ Ta DA!

The Mother of all Duck Tales

Like my father always said, ”If you can’t fix, Duck it!” I have heeded to this advice countless times throughout my life. I used it for everything: camping, sports, house repairs, car repairs, and so on. However, Duck tape has never been more important to my household than in the last 3 years.

Time and time again, duck tape had always prevailed in every situation I used it. I thought NOTHING could ever defeat duck tape. Unfortunately, I feared it had met its match three years ago…my twin autistic boys, one of which has Pica.

Losing their fight against their urge for texture stimulation and chewing, my one-year-old sons developed an insatiable need to take off their diaper, shred it to pieces, and eat it. For months, I scrubbed/disinfected soiled walls, floors, cribs, toys, sheets, and re-bathed the boys every night. I tried everything I could think of and even turned to behavior specialists for help. Nothing worked.

One night I surveyed their room at another failed solution to the problem. Through teary eyes I saw a roll of duck tape on a shelf across the room shining at me like a silver beacon of light!! A smile spread across my face. Snatching the roll up, I proceeded to Duck It.
They are almost five now and I still use the duck tape nightly to cover their entire diaper completely, giving it a chastity belt look. Expensive diapers “Non-Duckers” might say…but I say you can’t put a price on sanity.

Monday, November 3, 2008

My Top Five

This is my response to Super Mom's Top Five Blog. I told her I would post mine as my next blog. So these lists were inspired by her. I tried to come up with some new lists instead of just coping all of hers. I hope you enjoy them!

This blog is dedicated to my Sister.

Type of people I do not like
1 People who are too serious all the time
2 Assholes
3 People who talk through movies
4 Closeminded people
5 Liars

Things to do at Home When Kids Are Sleeping
1 Sleep
2 Play WOW
3 Watch Movies
4 Read
5 Sex

Material Items That Keep Me Sane
1 Duck Tape
2 Computer
3 Headache Medicine
4 Vodka
5 TV

1 Sal's
2 Red Lobster
3 Carlos O Kellys
4 Old Chicago
5 Scotch and Sirloin

Quick Dinners
1 Goodscents (delivery)
2 Pizza (delivery)
3 Turkey Slices rolled up w/ cottage cheese
4 Chinese
5 Taco Bell Nachos and sancho

Places I would Like To Visit
1 Australia
2 Hawaii
3 Somewhere haunted
4 Italy
5 Rain Forest

Sexy Actors To Have An Orgy With
1 Collin Farrell
2 Orlando Bloom
3 Jared Padalecki
4 Jensen Ackles
5 Russell Crowe

Everyday-Things I Hate To Do
1 Bills
2 Get the Mail
3 Clean Poop
4 Answer the Phone
5 Get up

Characteristics I Love About A Person
1 Honesty
2 Good Sense Humor
3 Thinks "out-side" the box
4 Passionate
5 Good Conversationalist

Things To Do When I Am Out Of My House
1 Go to Southrock and Play touch-screen
2 Go to the movies
3 Go out to eat
4 Go to a friends House
5 Shopping

Guilty Pleasures
1 Bubble Bath with a Glass of Wine
2 Vegging Out with a bunch of Movies
3 Being Naked
4 Playing with B.O.B
5 Fantasizing (research for my book, wink)

Toppings On Ice Cream
1 Hot Fudge
2 Whipped Cream
3 Cherries
4 Marshmallow
5 Caramel

Unusual things I have done
1 Went to race car driving school
2 Was a Bud Girl for Budweiser
3 Went Ghost hunting
4 Won wet t-shirt contests
5 Danced on stage at a 311 concert

Always wanted to do
1 Go to a Japanese cooking class
2 Join a Nudest colony
3 Go on a Safari
4 Deep Sea diving
5 Invent something

Things that make me happy
1 My children
2 My Husband
3 My family
4 My friends
5 Me

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Now and Then...

Lives change so much over a span a few years. Sometimes the changes go unnoticed for a time, but eventually you begin to recognize those changes. Some are positive and some are more on the negative side (at least you think they are) but in truth I feel most, if not all changes, have a positive result in which you as a person "grew." It is your basic principle of Cause and Effect.

Now a lot of people have a hard time seeing these changes as positive or may even "mourn" the loss of their old life, but in reality (if they REALLY look close at themselves) they are probably a more wise and balanced person because of them. Especially, because if the worst times in their lives. I know I am, and could name at least 15 other people that I see as stronger, wiser, and more passionate about their lives, even after some of the most cruel situations they had to endure and overcome.

I know that my life has been a roller coaster of ups and downs....(sorry about the cliche) There were times I actually thought that I could not take anymore. I felt I had nothing left to give and I had no where to turn. I was beaten. I wanted to do nothing more than cry every tear I could muster and just hate the world. Fortunately, it is at those moments, where you find the pinnacle of your strength and the strength of your friends and family. It is at those times where they are seen for their true selves. Sigh...I have wonderful people in my life. They never gave up on me, or doubted my ability to overcome. They reminded me of what I was made of and inspired me to fight. I thank them all for that. I will never be able to repay them (in my opinion) If you ask them about it, they would probably saw "it was nothing" or "I only did what anyone would do." They do not give themselves enough credit lol

An example of cause and effect: This is a recap of the most stressful events that had an physical and emotional impact on my life in last five years (negative first)

CAUSE: Was pregnant with twins, had a horrible pregnancy (many complications), I gave birth to twins, they were premature and spent 19 days in the NICU, within a month their birth my husband lost his job. I had already quit mine. He got another job as quickly as possible, but it was low paying. We went through a time were we couldn't even afford groceries. We went into MAJOR debt. Money was a big probem most of the time between hospital bills and so forth.

Adam lost his job about a year later...again starting all over with the money problems. Everything we had saved up, was gone again...back to the drawing board we go... Then of course we were on the "rebuilding stage" of our life. Up...down...up...down...emotions were getting the best of us and we were fighting alot. Then my sister got a divorce and she and Josie moved in with us. This was a stressful time, but I have to say it was negative AND positive. We had 6 people living under the same roof, with all of us having our own problems to deal with. But I have to say it was more fun then headache most of the time. She moved out, then it was just us again. A while later, my mother, cousin, and myself were held up at gun point in front of my home....had nightmares for months over that incident. We finally caught a break and was invited to move into a new home. Love you Cush!

Here we tried to start our life all over...forgetting our past problems, but they followed us to Derby. Adam was suffering in his new job...hated it SO much. He tore his maniscus in his knee and told his job that we needed time off to have the surgery and recovery time, they told him that was not likely. About two days after that, I found out I was pregnant again. Two weeks after his request for time off, he got fired for "being unorganized." (seriously, that it what the paper said) We tried to fight it, but we failed. Adam goes into a depression. He find another job at Cessna Woohooo!!! but the insurance will not take into effest for awhile. SO...I am five months pregnant before I get to see a doctor. Talk about stress!! For those of you that have been pregnant, you can probably understand. Oh yeah, during that fives months, we find out that both of our sons are Autisic. Let's just say I cried all the time because of hormones :-) Once again, I feel lost and the world seems soooo heavy. THEN, a few weeks before my delivery, Adam's stumbles upon a DUI. MORE MONEY!! MORE FIGHTS!! MORE HEARTACHE!! Sigh...

{Enters Positive Side stage left}

EFFECT: Throughout this entire ordeal, this is what came from the so-called negative changes in my life.

1. I was scared to get pregnant, but in my heart wanted to be a mommy. So life changed it for me. So, Now I am a mommy of three WONDEFUL children who have completed my life.

2. Adam hated his job and was scared to change. He felt he could not do better than what he was doing. So life changed it for him, drastically. Now he works at Cessna and loves his job. It has changed his attitutde towrds life and gave him the feeling of truly supporting his family and being a great husband and father.

3. Throughout the pregnancy with the boys I believe the hardships I went through were to get me toughened up for my motherhood. Raising twins boys is hard enough, throw in Autism and it is the most difficult obstacle I have ever had to overcome and adapt to.

4. Adam and I were very frivolous with our money...we learned the value of our money and have been making changes in order to become more responsible with finances. It has beena slow journey and we fail a lot, but we just pick ourselves back up and try again.

5. I have a tighter bond and more love for my family. I have never been closer to all members of my family and found that my sister is the best friend anyone could ever ask for....who would have thought? You would have never guessed that if you knew us in High School.

6. I learned many life lessons about myself and the people around me, giving more respect for them everyday. Some people/friends/family are in your life, but it is in times like these you realize who is REALLY there for you and who cares. These true friends will most likey be in your life to you final days. Love you Cush.

7. I re-evaluated my priorities in life. I think I have them right now :-)

8. I found out I am much stronger than I give myself credit for.

9. Adam realized he has much more to offer and he is proud of himself now.

10. I have found out that it is ok to ask for help. If you think it makes you weak, so be it. I have no problem admiting that in this particular time in my life I was weak and needed to draw on the stregnth of people around me. It doesn't mean I am weak as a whole...just means I was weak in the moment. I do what I must.

11. People like to help you. For most of us, it is a way to "pay back" the kindness that was show to us in a troubled time we had in our life. A "Pay it forward" type of thing. I can't wait for the time when I can pay back the kindness that was shown to me.

12. Autism isn't a tragedy or the end of a happy life, it is just a different life with different rules. It is an adventure and with it comes unforeseen problems, laughs, happiness, and LOVE. Plus other values in life that I took for granted. It forces you to experiment with all types of communications and I learned how to "read" people even better than I used to. They are getting better everyday! It is exciting! A few months ago my son told me he loved me first the first time...ever. I had never heard him say it and he is almost five. I cried. :-) Can you imgaine never hearing your child say I love you?

13. Having children really does teach you unconditional love.

14. I got a hard lesson in Don't Sweat the Small Things....but it was worth it. Others my not understand my lax attitude towards things others would flip out over, but I am not worried about it. If it works for my family and myself, then Whoopeee!

15. Finally, I have found that the one thing I felt I could not handle no matter what (my little girl) was a Godsend and has given me more happiness and hope that I ever thought was possible in the situation. She is my constant reminder that, no matter how bad you think things are...they could be the best thing that ever happened to you.

I have to say in all honesty I wouldn't change anything about my life. Of course I have my own dreams that have been put on hold, and it was not easy by any means to continue fighting each day, but my children, family, husband, and myself are things worth fighting for 'til my last breath. It has been hard to "look on the bright side" when life seems so destroyed and impossible, but it is there.....sometimes it just takes awhile for the light to shine through all that darkness you see before you.

"Any fact facing us is not as important as our attitude toward it, for that determines our success or failure." Norman Vincent Peale

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Newbie Blogger in the House!

Hi guys, gonna try and do this blogging thingy. We will see how I do. I just wanted to let you know I will try and do two blogs a week. If I really get into it or have a intereseting day, I will do more. Just do not expect too much right off the bat lol.

My blogs are mostly going to be about my everyday life. It might end up like a diary type thing. Most of them will probably recap my never ending struggle with Autism. I have twin sons that both live with Autism and a little girl that seems to have a developmental delay. (Doctors seems to think that she has learned this disability from her older brothers) So some may be very serious or depressing. (sorry about that)
On the other hand, my other blogs will probably fall into the catagories of just having a good laugh and hanging out with my fun side. ( I swear I have one)

So we will bounce around together.